More Side Splitting Poker Jokes
I found a few more of these great poker and casino jokes that I know you like so much. I am trying to find some of them that are more poker related due to the website, but sometimes I can only find jokes about casinos or just gambling. Enjoy!
Poker Face
Six guys were playing poker when Smith loses 500 dollar on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen comrade, the other five complete their playing time standing up.
Roberts looks around and asks, Now, who is going to tell the wife?
They draw straws. Rippington, who is always a loser, picks the short one.
They tell him to be discreet, be gentle, don't make a bad situation any worse than it is.
Gentlemen! Discreet? I am the most discreet man you will ever meet. Discretion is my middle name, leave it to me.
Rippington walks over to the Smith house, knocks on the door, the wife answers, asks what he wants.
Rippington says, Your husband just lost 500 dollars playing cards.
She hollers, TELL HIM TO DROP DEAD!
I will tell him, Rippington replies.
Borrowed Money
Buckshot was a compulsive gambler, and would bet on anything and everything; horses, dogs, football, baseball, basketball, snooker and even soccer games. When Buckshot was down to his last dollar, he went to his best friend and said Jim, I need 1000 dollars, we have no food, I owe rent, the kids need jeans for school, and the wife will not leave the house because we have bad checks at all the stores. Can you help me out?
So his best buddy gave him 2000 dollars to get him ahead, but on one condition, that he does not use the money for gambling. Buckshots reply was Oh, I have money put away for that.
4 for Poker
A doctor answers his phone and hears the familiar voice of a colleague on the other end of the line.
We need a fourth for poker, said the friend.
I will be right over, whispered the doctor.
As he was putting on his coat, his wife asked, Is it serious?
Oh yes, quite serious, said the doctor gravely. In fact, there are three doctors there already!
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